Getting Help For Yourself
All services are FREE and CONFIDENTIAL for victims and survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault
- Local and Toll Free Help Line: answered 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to provide emotional support, referral information, and safety planning.
- Crisis Intervention and Case Management: one-on-one action planning, emotional support, resource information, and advocacy during or following immediate crisis
- Emergency Room Advocacy and Accompaniment: including, but not limited to, transportation to University Hospital for SAFE exams
- Emergency Temporary Shelter: brief, offsite placement is available to victims of intimate partner violence (and the children of victims) or sexual assault
- Health and Wellness Support: encouragement, support, and guidance to help you realize and achieve your physical, spiritual, and emotional life goals
- Protection Orders: one-on-one assistance to complete emergency orders of protection for victims of intimate partner violence or sexual assault
- Court Advocacy: support throughout qualifying civil and criminal procedures for victims of domestic and sexual violence
- Support Group: weekly sessions offering group support and healing. Call for more information!
- Counseling: we contract with qualified service providers to meet the mental health needs of adult survivors of domestic and sexual violence.
- Prevention Education and Advocacy: presentations, workshops and seminars to schools, colleges, and treatment centers
Calling our 24-Hour Help Line
CARDV’s help line is available 24/7 to victims and survivors of intimate partner violence and sexual assault, and for those who may not be sure whether or not their relationship is abusive. Calling the help line does not commit you to further services and is confidential.
During an initial help line phone call, you can share your situation with an experienced, non-judgmental victim advocate. Our victim advocates can answer questions you may have about different types of abuse, what kind of help is available and how to access it, and emergency safety planning. The victim advocate’s goal is to support you and empower you in the decisions that you believe are the best for your life situation.
You can also call the help line for immediate crisis intervention to assist you to a safe location, access medical services immediately after an assault, or assist you with completing orders of protection. We can help you access emergency temporary shelter if you are facing an immediate threat of abuse.
Before you call, make sure you are in a safe place. If it is an emergency, please call 911.
Safety planning is critical for individuals that want an organized plan to avoid or to react to danger scenarios. If you feel like you may be in an abusive situation, whether it is happening now or might happen in the future, having a safety plan is recommended. While each safety plan is different, it can include information about how others can help you in a time of need, how you can protect yourself and others around you in an abusive situation, and resources that you can contact if you feel threatened.
Listed below are some tips on safety planning for specific situations. If you would like further help, please contact the CARDV helpline.
Safety Planning Tips
Safety while living with an abusive partner
-Find escape routes in your home that are away from weapons
-Have many practical reasons for leaving your home at different times of the day
-Keep a charged phone near you at all times
-Discuss code words or signals with a trusted friend or family member in case of an emergency
-Keep an emergency bag hidden in case you have to leave suddenly
Safety with children
-Teach your children how to escape safely
-Remind them not to intervene in a violent situation
-Teach your children how to call 911 in an emergency
-Have a plan of where the children can go in an emergency (trusted neighbor, grandparents, etc.)
Safety with pets
-Ask trusted friends or family members to provide a temporary home for your pet
-Local pet programs can assist in caring for animals while you are seeking safety. CARDV can assist in making necessary arrangements.
-If the abuser has the pet, ask law enforcement officers if they can intervene
-If you have left your abuser and have your pet, consider changing veterinarians
Checklist of Emergency Situation Items
- Order of protection copy
- Birth certificate
- Vaccination and medical records
- Social Security cards
- Welfare identification
- Green cards
- Driver’s license and registration
- Address book
- Credit cards
Resources on Safety Planning
If you are in danger, please try to use a safer computer that someone abusive does not have direct or remote (hacking) access to.
If you think your activities are being monitored, they probably are. Abusive people are often controlling and want to know your every move. You don’t need to be a computer programmer or have special skills to monitor someone’s computer and Internet activities – anyone can do it and there are many ways to monitor with programs like Spyware, keystroke loggers and hacking tools.
It is not possible to delete or clear all the “footprints” of your computer or online activities. If you are being monitored, it may be dangerous to change your computer behaviors such as suddenly deleting your entire Internet history if that is not your regular habit.
If you think you may be monitored on your home computer, be careful how you use your computer since an abuser might become suspicious. You may want to keep using the monitored computer for innocuous activities, like looking up the weather. Use a safer computer to research an escape plan, look for new jobs or apartments, bus tickets, or ask for help.
Email and Instant/Text Messaging (IM) are not safe or confidential ways to talk to someone about the danger or abuse in your life. If possible, please call our hotline instead. If you use email or IM, please use a safer computer and an account your abuser does not know about.
Computers can store a lot of private information about what you look at via the Internet, the emails and instant messages you send, internet-based phone and IP-TTY calls you make, web-based purchases and banking, and many other activities.
It might be safer to use a computer in a public library, at a trusted friend’s house, or an internet café.
Source: MOCADSV.ORG (Missouri Coalition Against Domestic & Sexual Violence)
Mid- Missouri Legal Services
Columbia: (573) 442-0116 Toll Free: (800) 568-4931
Jefferson City: (573) 634-4545 Toll Free: (888) 476-4545
Missouri victim automated notification system.
Access to information and notification for: Offender Custody Status, Court Hearings, Protective Order Status.
Missouri Safe at Home
Address confidentiality program.
Contact CARDV to apply
Crime Victim’s Compensation
The Crime Victims’ Compensation Program financially assists people who have sustained physical or psychological injury as a result of a violent crime by paying for reasonable medical and counseling expenses as well as lost wages if the victim was gainfully employed on the crime date.
Self-care is not selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.
Self-care is essential for overall health, especially after the trauma of domestic or sexual violence. It is critical in the process of healing and taking care of your body and mind. Some examples of self-care include surrounding yourself with positivity, focusing on your physical needs, rebuilding mental health, and learning how to take “time outs” when needed.
Ideas for Physical Self-Care
- Eat healthy meals regularly
- Drink plenty of water
- Strive to get quality sleep
- Exercise regularly
- yoga, running, swimming, walking, horseback riding, biking, weight-lifting, dancing, etc.
- Go to the doctor
- Take time off
- Get a massage
- Taking vitamins
Ideas for Emotional Self-Care
- Meet with a counselor
- Read books or poetry
- Breathing exercises
- Stay in contact with important people in your life
- Let yourself truly feel your emotions
- Join a support group
- Complete a puzzle or word search
- Play with pets
- Color or paint
Remember to take time for yourself and work on self-care, even if seems difficult to implement into your life. Make your self-care routine specific to your needs and interests. If you are having a hard time with self-care, consider scheduling daily self-care time in a planner or in an agenda.